Tuesday, November 23, 2010

November Blog Chain

I'm participating in my first ever blog chain through Absolute Writers and I'm nervous, nervous, nervous!  The assignment this month: a drabble, which is a piece of fiction of exactly 100 words.  For the sake of NaNoWriMo, we were allowed to go +/- 5 words.  (I'm over by 2)

So why the nervousness?  One hundred words doesn't seem that hard, right?  Well, I've decided to put up one hundred words of my YA WIP, Finding My Escape for my fellow writers to see and comment on.  It had to happen some time, letting professionals view my work.  Enough procrastinating, here it is:

I walked through the door.  It was dark…almost pitch black, and I had this uneasy feeling.  Everything was wrong somehow.  It was so quiet.  I shut the door slowly and started into the living room, tripping over something that shouldn’t be there.  My hand fell into something sticky. 

I heard a sound in the kitchen.

“Mom?” I called barely able to breathe.

“Don’t come in here honey, RUN!”

The sound of a voice being muffled, a struggle, a crash, one feeble whimper and then…           

My eyes began to adjust to the dark and I found myself staring into my father’s dead eyes.


  1. I too immediately thought 'zombie.' As always, zombies + darkness = cool.

  2. Startling imagery and a powerful little scene. [I was not thinking zombie :)]

  3. Actually, no, not a zombie. Murdered. Mom is in process of being murdered and daughter is left picking up the pieces. Zombie, though...intersting idea...

    Thanks for the input!

  4. totally not thinking zombie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the dad is dead though

  5. Zombie didn't occur to me until I read the comments then it did make sense. My first impression was it was a double murder in process. A very tense little scene though, that's for sure.

  6. wow this is good. I thought the dad did it....right? keep going! you got me captivated! trena

  7. Very dark scene

    I too didn't think of Zombie, but reading the comments has made me go hmmmm

    Top job


  8. a totally Hitchcock moment--scary to hear the mom speak as she was dying--very heartstring rending--sacrificial as well.

  9. Nice. I wasn't thinking of zombies either. But then I'm usually not. :)

  10. No, I wasn't thinking zombie either. I was thinking more along the lines of murder. Sorry I don't have anything to add that would help you. Brain is fried. But, I liked what I read and wanted to read more. Does that help? ~Nita